Every weekday at noon Smokey watches Gunsmoke, and many days he tells me the most colorful metaphor/simile of the day. Here is a brief sampling.
(to be directed at a person who does not take criticism well) “He’s the kind of man who wouldn’t even want to know if his hat was on backwards.”
“If your brains were in a mustard seed they would rattle around like a pea in a boxcar.”
Native American to Miss Kitty: “You are a good woman. If you would learn about your mouth, you could be a great woman.”
“I’ll be on him like a big dog on a small bone!”
“Good food is no excuse for bad manners.”
kmkat & her kneedles 
ha ha ha ha . Great fun quotes
I’d heard the second one as up a flea’s butt rather than in a mustard see, and a BB rather than a pea.
Gunsmoke wisdom is timeless! These are great!
It was embarrassingly late in my life that I learned “Get out of Dodge” originated with “Gunsmoke.”